Greetings.
In just about every book, movie, play etc., there is a point where the bad guy gets what's coming to him for being so malicious and evil. In THE PRINCESS BRIDE, it's when Westley comes back from the "dead". In FAT ALBERT, it's when Albert picks Reggie up and pretty much threatens him. Anyways, this is called a "comeuppance".
Well, today, I pretty much had mine.
These last few weeks have been exceptionally crappy. I get yelled at by Bentley for leaving a football game when it's over and then I get a LECTURE from Bev about the same topic. She doesn't say boo to him about him yelling at me and I DIDN'T EVEN RAISE MY VOICE. Dad's never around, Bev is always yelling, and Bentley is yelling at me too for anything and everything. I want to move to Gramps and Nana's for a while. But I promised Bentley I'd go to his stupid show LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS, (why am I going? I hate blood!) and I hate it when people break promises to me so I don't do it to them.
And then last night, at my request, Claire talked to Joseph about IT. I had been mad at Joseph because he didn't realize that, when I told him that he was the most important person to me, how dramatic and humiliating it was for me. So I was steering clear of the lunch table the last two days. Today I didn't go to school for the first two periods. I only went to school because I had a quiz in Mrs. Clark's Government class and I'd like to keep my A and Mrs. Yates only excuses two days a quarter (or is it semester?) for Library work.
Anyways, I was in the library during lunch like I told Claire I would be. And in through the front door comes Joseph. I think immediately: "Oh, crap." I have nowhere to run. So I strike up a quick conversation with Mrs. Yates and then shelf a book. He follows me and says he wants to talk. I sigh and we adjourn to the far back corner of the library, the most private place in the library. First, he tells me that he has known I liked him since sophomore year. Which is odd because *I* didn't even know until July, a few months later.
Then he gave me the verdict: Friends. Good friends.
He was surprised by my reaction. He said he had pictured me screaming and yelling and throwing punches. I had to laugh at that. That was the only time I smiled all day. But no, I was a big girl. I just collapsed to the ground because my knees gave out and I wanted to faint, to leave, to go home, to go faaaaaaaaaaaaar away. But I didn't say that. Truthfully, I feel numb. Like a part of me has died. I do still love him. That won't go away for a long time. But I wish, with all of my heart, that he loved me back.
Hugz
HM
Friday, September 17, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Little Kids
Greetings.
I have said that I like church. I don't like, however, the songs. They go on FOREVER in the teen service. Okay, I am getting back on track, um, there are two services at the church I go to. It's a small, homey church and that's the way I prefer it, not the Empire State Chapel, you know? Well, first service is for the older folk and during said service, the little kids have Sunday school. And that's my favorite part. So I volunteered to help with the 2- and 3-year-olds. Mrs. Morton, who's pretty much in charge of Sunday school (seriously,if the Mortons ever left the church, the church would absolutely crumble), told me to go help Miss Mikayla. And out of nowhere, Joseph joins me. (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
So we're playing with three little kids: two boys, Everett and Fritz (I kid you not, poor boy, what was his mother thinking?), and a girl, Alison. (I miss Ally now...) We were learning about creation and about how God created the animals and we were playing a finding game. The kids had to leave the room while Joseph and I hid the animals around the room for them to find. It was so fun. After that, we had to help the kids identify animals. Joseph was very patient with Alison. I was very impressed: you wouldn't think a robot would be so kind and gentle with little kids, but it just goes to show how wrong I can be.
Alison seems to have attached herself to me. She's only three, but she talks better than Bentley did. (I was kind of a genius talker, Bev says, so I can't compare her to me.) Anyways, as I was about to leave (I was not planning on staying for the teen service, I have four and a half hours of sleep under my belt and I was TIRED) she and her dad, the teen pastor, came into the room and she sees me and then turns to her dad and says, "I don't wanna go to the service." Her dad looks a little surprised and asks her what she wants to do. She points to me and says, "I wanna stay with her." He looked at me and I shrugged. So I spent the latter part of my church time with a smart little girl. We played house and she "covered" me with the pillows on the couches. Once she fell down and scraped her shin BAD (not bad enough that it bled, but it looked really bad) and I kept my cool and cleaned her off. I made her stop crying and got her Band-Aids and I felt SOOOOO bad. She's not even my kid (obviously) and I felt awful.
I had a nice day, so far.
Hugz
HM
I have said that I like church. I don't like, however, the songs. They go on FOREVER in the teen service. Okay, I am getting back on track, um, there are two services at the church I go to. It's a small, homey church and that's the way I prefer it, not the Empire State Chapel, you know? Well, first service is for the older folk and during said service, the little kids have Sunday school. And that's my favorite part. So I volunteered to help with the 2- and 3-year-olds. Mrs. Morton, who's pretty much in charge of Sunday school (seriously,if the Mortons ever left the church, the church would absolutely crumble), told me to go help Miss Mikayla. And out of nowhere, Joseph joins me. (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
So we're playing with three little kids: two boys, Everett and Fritz (I kid you not, poor boy, what was his mother thinking?), and a girl, Alison. (I miss Ally now...) We were learning about creation and about how God created the animals and we were playing a finding game. The kids had to leave the room while Joseph and I hid the animals around the room for them to find. It was so fun. After that, we had to help the kids identify animals. Joseph was very patient with Alison. I was very impressed: you wouldn't think a robot would be so kind and gentle with little kids, but it just goes to show how wrong I can be.
Alison seems to have attached herself to me. She's only three, but she talks better than Bentley did. (I was kind of a genius talker, Bev says, so I can't compare her to me.) Anyways, as I was about to leave (I was not planning on staying for the teen service, I have four and a half hours of sleep under my belt and I was TIRED) she and her dad, the teen pastor, came into the room and she sees me and then turns to her dad and says, "I don't wanna go to the service." Her dad looks a little surprised and asks her what she wants to do. She points to me and says, "I wanna stay with her." He looked at me and I shrugged. So I spent the latter part of my church time with a smart little girl. We played house and she "covered" me with the pillows on the couches. Once she fell down and scraped her shin BAD (not bad enough that it bled, but it looked really bad) and I kept my cool and cleaned her off. I made her stop crying and got her Band-Aids and I felt SOOOOO bad. She's not even my kid (obviously) and I felt awful.
I had a nice day, so far.
Hugz
HM
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Kenny is DEAD
Greetings.
Okay. I told you all about how Kenny told Joseph and how Joseph KNOWS and how everything, all my courage and my plans and my dreams and hopes and fears and and and - (slaps self) Thank you, I needed that - were absolutely RUINED???????
HE LIED TO ME.
That's right. I considered him a brother (we even had this society called the VS and I was second-in-command and he was the leader. But it was more like a family deal so he was the big brother and I the little sister even though I am older than him by a few months.) and he BETRAYED ME. And he can't even tell me WHY he did it. He keeps telling me THE BOSS made him do it. Why? Why did her hurt me? I tell everyone, the one thing that I cannot and WILL NOT stand for is LYING. Disloyalty and cheating are up there too, especially or my boyfriends and the boyfriends of my sisters, which Stan did to Bennie, but I will get into that tomorrow so that I can vent vehemently, but lying... why do it? All I ever did was support Kenny. And he lied? I suffered for over a month because he lied to me?
You know how I found out? I asked Joseph to recall the conversation he had with Kenny. He said he couldn't. I asked him if he was sure. He said he was. I told him to swear on his mother's life. He did. And it got me thinking: Joseph doesn't lie and I THINK that, even though he's sometimes a numbskull when it comes to remembering things, he would remember this. So I confronted Kenny about it. And he ADMITTED TO LYING TO ME. I could have killed him. I would have if I hadn't been talking to him on FACEBOOK at the time.
Oh I am so ANGRY. And hurt... What did I do to deserve it? What happened? WHY DID SOMEONE, ESPECIALLY KENNY, DO THIS TO ME?????????? Everyone thinks they can push me around because I'm fat. NEWS FLASH: I HAVE FEELINGS TOO. Lie to me and I hurt. Don't most people?
Hugz
HM
Okay. I told you all about how Kenny told Joseph and how Joseph KNOWS and how everything, all my courage and my plans and my dreams and hopes and fears and and and - (slaps self) Thank you, I needed that - were absolutely RUINED???????
HE LIED TO ME.
That's right. I considered him a brother (we even had this society called the VS and I was second-in-command and he was the leader. But it was more like a family deal so he was the big brother and I the little sister even though I am older than him by a few months.) and he BETRAYED ME. And he can't even tell me WHY he did it. He keeps telling me THE BOSS made him do it. Why? Why did her hurt me? I tell everyone, the one thing that I cannot and WILL NOT stand for is LYING. Disloyalty and cheating are up there too, especially or my boyfriends and the boyfriends of my sisters, which Stan did to Bennie, but I will get into that tomorrow so that I can vent vehemently, but lying... why do it? All I ever did was support Kenny. And he lied? I suffered for over a month because he lied to me?
You know how I found out? I asked Joseph to recall the conversation he had with Kenny. He said he couldn't. I asked him if he was sure. He said he was. I told him to swear on his mother's life. He did. And it got me thinking: Joseph doesn't lie and I THINK that, even though he's sometimes a numbskull when it comes to remembering things, he would remember this. So I confronted Kenny about it. And he ADMITTED TO LYING TO ME. I could have killed him. I would have if I hadn't been talking to him on FACEBOOK at the time.
Oh I am so ANGRY. And hurt... What did I do to deserve it? What happened? WHY DID SOMEONE, ESPECIALLY KENNY, DO THIS TO ME?????????? Everyone thinks they can push me around because I'm fat. NEWS FLASH: I HAVE FEELINGS TOO. Lie to me and I hurt. Don't most people?
Hugz
HM
School and Other Pleasures
Greetings.
Well, I love school. I have to admit it. I might as well tattoo the word "Geek" my forehead. I don't mind. I love being a geek. I would hate to be powerless and stupid. I love being smart. Granted, the social part of school I could sometimes live without like in seventh grade when my school - MY ENTIRE SCHOOL - pretty much left me for dead. But I wouldn't want to cut it out COMPLETELY. It just so happens that I love my school friends.
I digress.
Well, I have the EASIEST schedule ever. So some nights I have no homework. And on those nights... well... Dad suggests that I job hunt. I have tried that. BELIEVE me. And so in lieu of that, Bev suggests... shudder... the GYM. What do I choose? The gym. I am still struggling with my weight. But I am struggling MORE with the gym. I have no lung capacity, I have realized. And I sweat like Hell. And I always feel like someone is judging me. I go to this pretty good gym: it has a LADIES' SECTION. I love it. No demeaning stares from hotter guys. Just hotter women. And I don't give a crap about them. (Well actually yesterday I ran into my hairdresser, Julie. It was a little embarrassing.)
I'm really strong. So I love doing the shoulder and arm workout machines they have. But legs... that's my weak point. I tried that biking machine. HA! I lasted fifteen minutes. FIFTEEN MINUTES. I felt like John Pinette! And that's REALLY not good. So I swam today because I didn't want to drive and I STILL felt stupid because I don't know HOW long I lasted. And NOW Bev has this new diet she got from her doctor. I wish people would leave me alone. Although the diet looks tempting. Instead of one of my meals I'd drink a shake. If it's berry (or JAMBA JUICE! YAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!) I'm game. So yeah... I really hate exercise.
Wait, how did I get from school and the other good things in my life to THE GYM? (barf)
(reading, lips moving along with the words...) ...Oh. That's how.
Hugz
HM
Also, keep Ally in your thoughts. She tore her ACL, kind of an Achilles heel (oh, the irony) for an athlete. Love you, Allyson!
Well, I love school. I have to admit it. I might as well tattoo the word "Geek" my forehead. I don't mind. I love being a geek. I would hate to be powerless and stupid. I love being smart. Granted, the social part of school I could sometimes live without like in seventh grade when my school - MY ENTIRE SCHOOL - pretty much left me for dead. But I wouldn't want to cut it out COMPLETELY. It just so happens that I love my school friends.
I digress.
Well, I have the EASIEST schedule ever. So some nights I have no homework. And on those nights... well... Dad suggests that I job hunt. I have tried that. BELIEVE me. And so in lieu of that, Bev suggests... shudder... the GYM. What do I choose? The gym. I am still struggling with my weight. But I am struggling MORE with the gym. I have no lung capacity, I have realized. And I sweat like Hell. And I always feel like someone is judging me. I go to this pretty good gym: it has a LADIES' SECTION. I love it. No demeaning stares from hotter guys. Just hotter women. And I don't give a crap about them. (Well actually yesterday I ran into my hairdresser, Julie. It was a little embarrassing.)
I'm really strong. So I love doing the shoulder and arm workout machines they have. But legs... that's my weak point. I tried that biking machine. HA! I lasted fifteen minutes. FIFTEEN MINUTES. I felt like John Pinette! And that's REALLY not good. So I swam today because I didn't want to drive and I STILL felt stupid because I don't know HOW long I lasted. And NOW Bev has this new diet she got from her doctor. I wish people would leave me alone. Although the diet looks tempting. Instead of one of my meals I'd drink a shake. If it's berry (or JAMBA JUICE! YAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!) I'm game. So yeah... I really hate exercise.
Wait, how did I get from school and the other good things in my life to THE GYM? (barf)
(reading, lips moving along with the words...) ...Oh. That's how.
Hugz
HM
Also, keep Ally in your thoughts. She tore her ACL, kind of an Achilles heel (oh, the irony) for an athlete. Love you, Allyson!
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Tattoos
Greetings.
No, I didn't get a tattoo, I promise. Joseph has just been doodling on my arm for the last two days. He has these Green Lantern and other colored rings form the comic series and he wears at least one to school every day with his class ring. For the last two days, he has imprinted three of the insignias on my arm. (Ow.) Then with the imprint as a base, he draws the design so that when the imprint fades, I'll still have it. It kind of feels like he's branding me. Cool!
But let us discuss tattoos for a minute. What are they? You get a tattoo by having someone stick you thousands of times with a needle dipped in ink and sexually transmitted diseases (the diseases give the ink a nice purplish color). Why do people do it? Some for sluttiness i.e. a rose on a woman's breast, a heart on her hip, or self-expression i.e. a peace sign, a cross, or a yin yang symbol. (In fact, if I ever got a tattoo I'd get either a yin yang symbol or a four-leaf clover. I'm not sure where.) But basically tattoos are permanent forms of art. Eventually when you get old and saggy, that heart is going to look like a gallstone and that rose will turn into Rosie O'Donnell, but that's what laser surgery is for! Yay!
I find tattoos to be interesting. I'm not going to get one. I don't like needles (I freaked when I had my ears pierced) and what if the dude got it wrong? But the thought processes behind the tattoos fascinate me.
Wow, I got really off topic... Oh, well. I think I made sense...?
Hugz
HM
No, I didn't get a tattoo, I promise. Joseph has just been doodling on my arm for the last two days. He has these Green Lantern and other colored rings form the comic series and he wears at least one to school every day with his class ring. For the last two days, he has imprinted three of the insignias on my arm. (Ow.) Then with the imprint as a base, he draws the design so that when the imprint fades, I'll still have it. It kind of feels like he's branding me. Cool!
But let us discuss tattoos for a minute. What are they? You get a tattoo by having someone stick you thousands of times with a needle dipped in ink and sexually transmitted diseases (the diseases give the ink a nice purplish color). Why do people do it? Some for sluttiness i.e. a rose on a woman's breast, a heart on her hip, or self-expression i.e. a peace sign, a cross, or a yin yang symbol. (In fact, if I ever got a tattoo I'd get either a yin yang symbol or a four-leaf clover. I'm not sure where.) But basically tattoos are permanent forms of art. Eventually when you get old and saggy, that heart is going to look like a gallstone and that rose will turn into Rosie O'Donnell, but that's what laser surgery is for! Yay!
I find tattoos to be interesting. I'm not going to get one. I don't like needles (I freaked when I had my ears pierced) and what if the dude got it wrong? But the thought processes behind the tattoos fascinate me.
Wow, I got really off topic... Oh, well. I think I made sense...?
Hugz
HM
Sunday, August 22, 2010
School and Awards
Greetings.
Senior. Year. Starts. TOMORROW. BEGIN FREAK OUT SESSION NOW!!!!! I cannot believe that I'm going to be a senior! I mean, college admissions, scholarships, admissions essays, SATs, ACTs, migraines, jobs, I think I'm hyperventilating just THINKING ABOUT IT! I'm kind of scared. I mean, I have no idea what life is like outside of school. (Summer doesn't count) I have to get a job or else I lose my baby Kermit, I'm going to college in a year, and I'm going to live life on my own. I don't know anything! I'm smart, but I don't know how to work with the real world. I ALREADY HATE SENIOR YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!
... Okay, I have calmed down now. Last night I went to an awards ceremony similar to the Tonys for my community theater group, the group with whom I performed ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Anyways, I won something. I was nominated for Best Leading Actress for my role as The Witch for INTO THE WOODS. I won a Spirit of Junior Theater Award for exemplifying all that Junior Theater stands for. (I didn't win Best Actress. However, the only girl I would have been alright with winning won, so I'm better than I would have been if someone else had won it.) The best part about winning it was that BENTLEY WON IT WITH ME! The award goes to the boy AND the girl who exemplifies all the wonderful qualities they want and we made a speech together. It was really awesome! I opened with, "Just for the record, I am older. But he's cuter so it doesn't matter much." (I said that because he's five feet, eleven inches and I am only five feet, four and a half inches tall.) It was pretty good.
Joseph was there. Nothing was out of the ordinary, but something he said at church today made me uneasy. He said he didn't put too much emotional stock in things just in case it didn't work out the way he planned. What if he doesn't put too much emotional stock into the fact that I am practically in love with him? What if he doesn't care? I think that may be even worse...
Hugz
HM
Senior. Year. Starts. TOMORROW. BEGIN FREAK OUT SESSION NOW!!!!! I cannot believe that I'm going to be a senior! I mean, college admissions, scholarships, admissions essays, SATs, ACTs, migraines, jobs, I think I'm hyperventilating just THINKING ABOUT IT! I'm kind of scared. I mean, I have no idea what life is like outside of school. (Summer doesn't count) I have to get a job or else I lose my baby Kermit, I'm going to college in a year, and I'm going to live life on my own. I don't know anything! I'm smart, but I don't know how to work with the real world. I ALREADY HATE SENIOR YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!
... Okay, I have calmed down now. Last night I went to an awards ceremony similar to the Tonys for my community theater group, the group with whom I performed ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Anyways, I won something. I was nominated for Best Leading Actress for my role as The Witch for INTO THE WOODS. I won a Spirit of Junior Theater Award for exemplifying all that Junior Theater stands for. (I didn't win Best Actress. However, the only girl I would have been alright with winning won, so I'm better than I would have been if someone else had won it.) The best part about winning it was that BENTLEY WON IT WITH ME! The award goes to the boy AND the girl who exemplifies all the wonderful qualities they want and we made a speech together. It was really awesome! I opened with, "Just for the record, I am older. But he's cuter so it doesn't matter much." (I said that because he's five feet, eleven inches and I am only five feet, four and a half inches tall.) It was pretty good.
Joseph was there. Nothing was out of the ordinary, but something he said at church today made me uneasy. He said he didn't put too much emotional stock in things just in case it didn't work out the way he planned. What if he doesn't put too much emotional stock into the fact that I am practically in love with him? What if he doesn't care? I think that may be even worse...
Hugz
HM
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Comic-Con or E3
Greetings.
Okay, I have now asked Bev, Nana, and Daddy for tickets for me, Joseph, and a chaperone to go to one of these events. I am vouching for Comic-Con cause it's cheaper and more people will be there. Like, famous people. But E3 would be fun because I like video games. Either way, I'm kind of freaked too. I mean, I'd be at a convention where I've never been before. And with Joseph and a chaperone.
...Okay, now that I've said this out loud, I see how crazy I'm being. I need to rescind my request... I am nuts. Someone get me to electrotherapy quick.
And speaking of electrotherapy, I am listening to THE ADDAMS FAMILY Broadway musical. I actually enjoy it. The music is fun and I like the story line. Poor Wednesday, all she wants is to be a little more normal. Well, normal-ISH. It's fun. 7 out of 10.
Hugz
HM
Okay, I have now asked Bev, Nana, and Daddy for tickets for me, Joseph, and a chaperone to go to one of these events. I am vouching for Comic-Con cause it's cheaper and more people will be there. Like, famous people. But E3 would be fun because I like video games. Either way, I'm kind of freaked too. I mean, I'd be at a convention where I've never been before. And with Joseph and a chaperone.
...Okay, now that I've said this out loud, I see how crazy I'm being. I need to rescind my request... I am nuts. Someone get me to electrotherapy quick.
And speaking of electrotherapy, I am listening to THE ADDAMS FAMILY Broadway musical. I actually enjoy it. The music is fun and I like the story line. Poor Wednesday, all she wants is to be a little more normal. Well, normal-ISH. It's fun. 7 out of 10.
Hugz
HM
Monday, August 16, 2010
Crisis
Greetings.
Oh, this can't be happening. This just CANNOT be happening. Joseph KNOWS. I mean, he knows I like him. I don't know if he knows to what degree my feelings for him are, but he knows I like him.
You remember Kenny Harris, Claire's ex-boyfriend? Well, it seems he has decided to take it upon himself to make my life Hell. During ALICE IN WONDERLAND, (he was a techie, and Joseph was Kind of Hearts, like I mentioned earlier) Kenny and Joseph had a chat. Apparently, during that little chat, either Kenny to Joseph or Joseph divulged that he knew. Either way, Kenny told me he knew. And, to make things worse, he (Joseph) is scared for our relationship. What do I do? I don't know what that means! Does he not want it to change? Is he afraid of what will happen if it does change? I NEED A MIND-READING HELMET!
I really want to strangle Kenny right now. For the past year (YEAR) I have been trying to dig up the courage to perform this great feat of love at graduation. Here was my plan: I'd take him aside, ask him to guarantee that he'd still be my friend even if I did something horrible and/or stupid, and (even though I'd only do it if he promised) then I'd have him close his eye (optional) and I'd kiss him.
THAT'S ALL BYE-BYE. At least, for now. All of my courage is GONE, what little there was of it. If any of you know me, you know I am not easily frightened. I have my phobias i.e. blood, death, the future, spiders larger than my forefinger, amphibians, reptiles. But those are so rare, except for maybe the blood and the future (ha ha), that I am not scared easily.
But this time... This terrifies me. He is my best friend. My confidant. God only knows, maybe my soul-mate. I love him dearly but I want his friendship too. If he gets too scared, he'll leave and I don't know if I can take that. When Freddy dumped me, I gained 40 pounds. Joseph means so much more to me than Freddy ever did. I don't know what will happen to me. Or to him. I think that, somehow, he needs me too. Almost as much as I need him. I'm scared. Scared out of my mind. More scared than I have been for YEARS.
Are you there, God? It's me, Harmony Margaret. The one you cursed with the longest name EVER. Please, help me. Find some way to help me. I need it. I would appreciate you changing Joseph's heart in favor of me, but anything to help is preferable than silence.
I must go cry myself to sleep now.
Hugz
HM
Oh, this can't be happening. This just CANNOT be happening. Joseph KNOWS. I mean, he knows I like him. I don't know if he knows to what degree my feelings for him are, but he knows I like him.
You remember Kenny Harris, Claire's ex-boyfriend? Well, it seems he has decided to take it upon himself to make my life Hell. During ALICE IN WONDERLAND, (he was a techie, and Joseph was Kind of Hearts, like I mentioned earlier) Kenny and Joseph had a chat. Apparently, during that little chat, either Kenny to Joseph or Joseph divulged that he knew. Either way, Kenny told me he knew. And, to make things worse, he (Joseph) is scared for our relationship. What do I do? I don't know what that means! Does he not want it to change? Is he afraid of what will happen if it does change? I NEED A MIND-READING HELMET!
I really want to strangle Kenny right now. For the past year (YEAR) I have been trying to dig up the courage to perform this great feat of love at graduation. Here was my plan: I'd take him aside, ask him to guarantee that he'd still be my friend even if I did something horrible and/or stupid, and (even though I'd only do it if he promised) then I'd have him close his eye (optional) and I'd kiss him.
THAT'S ALL BYE-BYE. At least, for now. All of my courage is GONE, what little there was of it. If any of you know me, you know I am not easily frightened. I have my phobias i.e. blood, death, the future, spiders larger than my forefinger, amphibians, reptiles. But those are so rare, except for maybe the blood and the future (ha ha), that I am not scared easily.
But this time... This terrifies me. He is my best friend. My confidant. God only knows, maybe my soul-mate. I love him dearly but I want his friendship too. If he gets too scared, he'll leave and I don't know if I can take that. When Freddy dumped me, I gained 40 pounds. Joseph means so much more to me than Freddy ever did. I don't know what will happen to me. Or to him. I think that, somehow, he needs me too. Almost as much as I need him. I'm scared. Scared out of my mind. More scared than I have been for YEARS.
Are you there, God? It's me, Harmony Margaret. The one you cursed with the longest name EVER. Please, help me. Find some way to help me. I need it. I would appreciate you changing Joseph's heart in favor of me, but anything to help is preferable than silence.
I must go cry myself to sleep now.
Hugz
HM
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Review: THE SORCERER'S APPRENTICE
Greetings.
Well, Nana, Bev, and I went to see THE SORCERER'S APPRENTICE earlier this evening. My verdict: Four out of five stars. It was good. I love Nic Cage. He's a great actor. His character is hysterical and he's hot. I'm sorry, but for a 1,000+ year old guy, Balthasar is hot. But then again, so is Nic Cage. You know, I think he looks better with longer hair. But then, that may be my own personal taste. On guys I like-
Okay, I digress. The guy who played Dave, Jay Bucharel, I think his name was, did very well at playing the lovable nerd. I adore lovable nerds. Which explains why I love Joseph. He has longish hair, glasses, and that confidence in who he is as a person. Very sexy. Anyways, Jay did a great job. The plot of the movie was predictable but I found it very interesting. I liked how they fairly accurately referenced Merlin and Morgana Le Faye. But as I recall, Merlin only had one charge (hello, Arthur) and he never died. Morgana led him to a cave and made him sleep. AND he aged backwards. Sheesh, they need to do their homework. Sorry, I am a big myth and legend fan. In fact, Greek mythology is one of my specialties and I was very happy with Rick Riordan and how he did his PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS series. He stayed very true to the established myths.
Anyways, good movie. Go see it. (P.S. ALFRED MOLINA ROCKS HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Hugz
HM
Well, Nana, Bev, and I went to see THE SORCERER'S APPRENTICE earlier this evening. My verdict: Four out of five stars. It was good. I love Nic Cage. He's a great actor. His character is hysterical and he's hot. I'm sorry, but for a 1,000+ year old guy, Balthasar is hot. But then again, so is Nic Cage. You know, I think he looks better with longer hair. But then, that may be my own personal taste. On guys I like-
Okay, I digress. The guy who played Dave, Jay Bucharel, I think his name was, did very well at playing the lovable nerd. I adore lovable nerds. Which explains why I love Joseph. He has longish hair, glasses, and that confidence in who he is as a person. Very sexy. Anyways, Jay did a great job. The plot of the movie was predictable but I found it very interesting. I liked how they fairly accurately referenced Merlin and Morgana Le Faye. But as I recall, Merlin only had one charge (hello, Arthur) and he never died. Morgana led him to a cave and made him sleep. AND he aged backwards. Sheesh, they need to do their homework. Sorry, I am a big myth and legend fan. In fact, Greek mythology is one of my specialties and I was very happy with Rick Riordan and how he did his PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS series. He stayed very true to the established myths.
Anyways, good movie. Go see it. (P.S. ALFRED MOLINA ROCKS HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Hugz
HM
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Tears Of Sleep Deprivation
Greetings.
How many people cry for joy? How many people just get so happy that they cry? I don't, normally. I mean, I have a slight reputation as being one of the following: a nerd, a girl with anger-management problems, a loner, or the loudest most out spoken feminist in my school. One of them, or maybe a compilation of a few of them. But never "crybaby". At least, not after seventh grade.
But earlier this morning, I FINALLY got a reply from Joseph. His cell phone wasn't working, I guessed, so I texted his dad. Once, just once. And he wrote back. (Joseph, not Mr. M. Well, he did too, but I am not as into that. ha ha. not funny) And I cried. I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO pathetic! It didn't help that I hadn't slept beforehand.
I soooo need to fix my sleep schedule. AND I need to finish my summer reading. (opens up new window, talking to self) Oh, Sparknotes, where are you?
Hugz
HM
How many people cry for joy? How many people just get so happy that they cry? I don't, normally. I mean, I have a slight reputation as being one of the following: a nerd, a girl with anger-management problems, a loner, or the loudest most out spoken feminist in my school. One of them, or maybe a compilation of a few of them. But never "crybaby". At least, not after seventh grade.
But earlier this morning, I FINALLY got a reply from Joseph. His cell phone wasn't working, I guessed, so I texted his dad. Once, just once. And he wrote back. (Joseph, not Mr. M. Well, he did too, but I am not as into that. ha ha. not funny) And I cried. I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO pathetic! It didn't help that I hadn't slept beforehand.
I soooo need to fix my sleep schedule. AND I need to finish my summer reading. (opens up new window, talking to self) Oh, Sparknotes, where are you?
Hugz
HM
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